Dressed By Nuns

By Anthony Buccino

On gym days, instead of white blouse and maroon cravat, girls in our catholic school wore gym uniforms under their maroon plaid jumpers.

Boys wore gym shorts under charcoal gray trousers and stripped down from white shirt and school tie to a white T-shirt.
Our gym trousers had one pocket on one back cheek. That pocket, said our crew-cut wearing gym teacher, was for our hankie. We must each have a clean, white hankie when we come to gym class.

 When he was finished running us around the gym in left-face, right-face, about-face drills, or kickball, we returned, sweaty, thirsty and out of breath to Sister in an empty class. The girls were gone, gone to gym class.

 The boys were dressed by nuns.

Sister first told the boys, "Put on your shirt. Yes, over your T-shirt.
"Now, button your shirt. Make sure you have the right buttons.
"Pull on your trousers over your gym shorts."

Then each boy took his looped necktie from the seat back, already neatly tied in Windsor knots from the morning, and slipped them over their heads and under white shirt collars. Each boy, in his time, held the knot and tugged the smaller tail to a snug fit.

In moments they were ready for learning.

When the girls returned and dressed, my reading group left Sister JoAnn and went next door with Sister Lenore (or was it Eleanor?)

Sister JoAnn had a tan, soft Mother Mary face, round soft cheeks, dark eyes and a large nose that seemed small only when next to Sister Lenore (or was it Eleanor?)

Sister Lenore (or was it Eleanor?) had a thinner face with sharp contrasting cheekbones and bigger eyes than Sister JoAnn.

Sister JoAnn seemed to be the sweeter teacher and Sister Lenore (or was it Eleanor?) had a reputation of swift, fierce coercion with a paddle of solid oak, or her stand-by yard-long pointer with the chalk-covered rubber tip.

One time I called Sister Lenore (or was it Eleanor?) Sister Eleanor (or was it Sister Lenore that I called her?) and she let me know I called her incorrectly so that I would never forget her name was Sister Lenore (or was it Eleanor?)

She made it clear, in no uncertain terms to this third grader that "God help you," her name was Sister Lenore (or was it Eleanor?)

I swiftly promised never again, "God help me," to call her the wrong name.

The fourth grade kids who had had Sister Lenore (or was it Eleanor?) a year earlier told us what a great teacher she was when they had her in third grade.

They said she put a "testing" sign on the closed door to her classroom and then let them watch cartoons on the black/white TV permanently mounted in the classroom.
They also said the statues in the church came alive and danced the Twist like Chubby Checkers.

Copyright © 1996-2005, Anthony Buccino, All Rights Reserved

  May 2005: ... This just in: ... She was called ... Sister Leonora. ... She has since ... left the order. ...

Adapted from Sister Dressed Me Funny

This is about 500 of the 2840 words from the published original.

How to Order

Kindergarten